Dr.Knuckles

I am currently hiring English, French, Portuguese and Spanish language instructors for our downtown Vancouver language centre.

We offer: a wage that could charitably be described as "minimal", paid training, the opportunity to work for me, union membership, a fun and rewarding atmosphere, the chance to meet super-hot foreign students, an elite global corporation to put on your resume.

You have: a dislike of money and status, a passion for teaching, Canadian work visa or citizenship (this means you, military deserters), a professional attitude and demeaner.

If you yourself are deemed a "super hot foreigner" - there may be an 'oral exam' as part of the interview.

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

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Bowerbird

Promises promises - I can speak fluent Aussie if that is on the agenda

This sad little lizard told me that he was a brontosaurus on his mother’s side. I did not laugh; people who boast of ancestry often have little else to sustain them. Humouring them costs nothing and adds to happiness in a world in which happiness is always in short supply.

R. A. Heinlein

At present, the internet allows one to claim anything, relationship to royalty, physical attributes and expertise they do not have...........

Goldwater

Oh!! pick me!!!! You know how verbose I can be, that's because I know the entire English language!!and enough Spanish to land the whole expedition in jail!

michaelr

Can I stay home and do nothing?

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Tar, $15.00
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Sending an unmistakable message to the government that We The People still own this country, PRICELESS!

The_Bear

i don't speak canadian.

The ignorant ask "what is my effect on the world?"
The enlightened ask "What does the world know about itself?"

The Bear

I am The Bear
The Bear

Blueneck

Gee, all that's missing is abusive customers, standing on my feet all day and being forced to bring doughnuts on Sunday, and it would be just like the job I already have! Well, one them, anyway.

Sparta

Ok, asking questions is always where I mess up a perfectly good interview, here goes...

So, these students, they are of legal age as in not high school?
Meaning I can sleep with the ladies and beat up the men type deal?

Ausinus

Im extremely confident I can pass the oral test.

And man said, let there be light, and he was blessed by light, heat, magnetism, gravity, and all the energies of the universe.

Dr.Knuckles

"Your oral exam was too long, sloppy, and the ending was a complete mess..... you get an A+"


The students are all in their 20's, university age, ranging from "Oh Holy Crap HOT" Brazilians to "so cute I just wanna eat her up cute" Koreans and Japanese" to "let's argue about politics and religion while we freak it doggy on my desk" Swiss and Germans. There's also a few "I'm just really not interested thanks Taiwanese" and a couple "wish I knew if that were a man or a woman Thai".

All in all I wish I were single about 6 times a minute.

If anyone at work reads this off my computer I'm fired on the spot. I wouldnt even be allowed to pack up my stuff. They'd mail it to me along with the restraining order.

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

Goldwater

Great, I can go move in with my nice friends who invited me back to thier apartment on East Hastings last time I visited Vancouver. I told them about how I had plenty of money and they were so hospitable and wanted me to come live with them. They are all famous artists in Vancouver, you could tell because thier eyes and finger nails were yellow, and their skin was kind of ashen grey. And one of them must have had epilepsy, shook the whole time poor dear.

Anyway I'm off, I'll send you an email when I get there, you gotta move when the opportunity Knucks, hah hah